Since having our 5th child our house has been anything but a house of order. I have felt so overwhelmed and swamped with just the simple daily tasks. I have so many things on my "to do" list and they never get done because I never have time to get to it. I am doing the basics all the time...meals, cleanup, feedings, changings, meals, cleanup. Take. Pickup. dinner. cleanup. Don't get me wrong. I love my job. I love being a mom. I love babies. I love kids. I felt inspired to have a fifth child. But why would the Lord inspire me unless he felt I could do this without losing my mind. I also want to magnify my calling at church. I want my husband to magnify his. But I also want that house of order. I want to open drawers and find what I need and be able to shut the drawer again. I want to open the pantry and know whats in there without having to look over opened packages that were just shoved in to get them out of the way. I want to look around and not see piles and piles of things I need to get to but never have the time. I want to decorate and update. I want some time to myself....to blow dry my hair after a shower and curl it and put on some makeup and some jewelry. I want to have time to help my kids with their homework. I want to have time to teach my kids how to work. I don't want to be grumpy and always feel like I am leaving things undone. I don't want to be a space case and forgetful and unorganized. And there is so much more I want...and need. Do I want to much? Am I supposed to just do the basics and look frumpy and be tired all the time? It didn't sound right to me.
As I was picking up the carpool from scouts, driving them to baseball and feeding Ruby a bottle while I drove (in her car seat, just with my arm wrenched behind me) I had a thought. " Natalee, it is okay to get some help. You need some help." My thoughts said. "A mothers helper." A smile came across my face. That is my solution! Help! Duh! I thought of Abigail Adams and how she was an extremely hard worker and kept the farm up and running while John was gone so much. But she did it with help. She had servants! It didn't mean she didn't work or was lazy. It means she took care of what needed to be taken care of and got the help she needed.
The next step was figuring out how to afford it. Things are tight as they are with five. But not that tight. We have iPhones and Internet and TV. We go on trips and dates. We have some nice things. Surely we can afford a mothers helper. Steve and I had some discussions (to say the least) and we reworked our priorities so I can have a mothers helper two times a week for two hours. Bliss.
I asked two of my babysitters if they were interested and they said yes and in fact they were so excited they said they would do it for free. So cute, but of course I am paying them.
Day one. My helper came after school. She knocked on the door and Abram ran to get it. I'm sitting on the couch nursing Ruby as Sadie is asking me homework questions, Everett is jumping next to me, and Hudson is asking me something about a friend coming over and the house is the usual explosion with backpacks, shoes, dishes, etc, etc. "Just in time." I told her. I asked if she could help Sadie with her homework. Sadie was excited (because she loves this babysitter) and went of with her while I took care of the other kids' needs. The rest of the afternoon she cleaned the kitchen, played with the kids while I caught up on laundry. Today when she came I had her clean and organize the fridge and pantry. I cleaned the car, worked with the kids on their chores and continued the laundry catch up. Wow. Why did I not think of this earlier? Or maybe I had but brushed it off because I felt I could do it all myself, or it wasn't important to have an organized home? I don't know. All I do know is I have been so happy these last two days! I'm usually a pretty happy person, but I haven't felt this happy in a while. I felt like I was finally taking care of myself and I have a vision of my house of order. As I was working on things I realized I could have used this a long time ago but felt too much guilt. Thinking I should do more or have my kids do more. But I honestly feel that my kids do a decent amount for their ages. Hudson does his own laundry, they pack their own lunches, they pickup every night, they do Saturday chores. If I had them do anymore they wouldn't have any free time or time for extra activities. Plus today I was able to work with them on their chores. Teach them. Where before they would go get it done (and do a not so great job) and I would say, "good enough". I feel good about this. I am excited.
